Hello Human Listener.

Ok, hello folks. I had a bad day. Its weird cause nothing bad happened. Its all in my attitude, which sucked a serious fat one today. All day, in my head, I was like "Al, why aren't you working at an architecture firm?... What the fuck is wrong with you?.. Your work is pretty good, right?... Then what the fuck is the problem?... " It was a day of questioning my worth as a human being. And it was not fun. I wasn't my optimistic, chipper self. I can only hope that tomorrow will be better. If SOM would just call me, I would: A) be getting paid three or four times what I am now. B) Have a regular human being's schedule, which I am oh so eager to have. C) Have a job that pertains to my studies and interests. D) Be able to call my Mom and make her proud. (that's a big one) E) Be able to dress up and commute downtown and feel somewhat successful. F) Finally be able to not call my mom for money. (I'm so fucking sick of doing that, and I'm sure she is too.) .... So you get the point. Right now I'm listening to White Zombie and drinking to try to get out of my own over-analystic head for a while, so I can truely relax. I think I'm finally close. The main reason I haven't been typing blog entries more frequently is that I 've been so damned depressed, and I feel like sharing that is not that cool... Oh great, James Taylor on shuffle. About the most depressing music I can hear, being that it was my late dad's favorite. Wow, I'm drunk and this is too personal. I'll send it anyways, fuck it.. life is short... If I never send anything, you guys will never know me. And as much as I'd like to think I'm a loner, I'm definitely not. I need friends like you. Thanks human listener.